Letter

To: T

well last night i upset my best girlfriend and now im trying to think of ways to solve it.

i know my explanation is gna be weak too, i mean, who am i kidding, it's not gna mean that im not at fault.

but yeah im just gna say out what happened the entire day yesterday.

before i left house yesterday, my mum specifically came into my room and asked me not to go clubbing.

and i even said 'i not going clubbing lah' to her.

so, we, Dawn, Gerald, Keith, Yonghan & i met up for Gerald's birthday at vivo yesterday.

our plan was very simple: Dinner and Movie.

so i was late and we reached there at around 6+ 7, and so we thought we should go book the tickets first.

so we went to GV and wanted to book Easy A for 8+.

but then seats available were only at the 1st row.

so we were like, shit dont want lah.

then someone said to get the next timing one which was 10+.

but i said, eh we go eat first lah. then after that we decide whether we want to watch a not then can buy again.

so okay, we headed off to Fig & Olives for dinner.

and then we were thinking about going clubbing.

because the stupid restaurant(or maybe Vivo) was playing all the stupid clubbing songs.

i freaking swear. one after another.

and we were like 'omgomg it's a sign it's a sign'.

then after dinner we were thinking about where to go and what to do next.

then we walked around Vivo and were thinking about all our options.

at first we were all very hyped about clubbing.

plus because YH's cousin and friends will be going powerhouse on that night.

and he was supposed to join them too because it was his friends's birthday too.

but a part of Dawn and i were a bit reluctant because we didnt want to break our promise to ourselves and me, to my mum.

then i thought, 'hey, pubbing is not considered clubbing.'

so we thought about just going for drinks, because the guys were afraid about the going in part.

and we wouldnt be asked for IC if we went to drink instead.

plus we wont be hanging out till too late.

so we were contemplating about going to Holiday Inn to get drinks and then go sit at the bridge at Zouk/Phuture to drink, or to go to Clarke Quay to get drinks from the 7-11 and drink at the river.

so we decided with the former.

so we took the train from Harbourfront to Clarke Quay.

and when we were already making our way to the bus stop and then..

wait i dont rmb what really happened here.

i think YH received a call from his cousin asking if we wanted to join and that they could get us in.

so we were sitting at the steps and deciding what to do next.

we were kinda reluctant because we were thinking about what if we got bounced out, then what's gna happen next?

and i sort of kinda didnt want to go because i had no idea what to tell my mum and the promise was still there.

and as dawn said, we just had to wait for another 3-4 more days then it'll be december.

but well we didnt. and i ended up saying 'anything loh'

i guess there are so many reasons why i said yes and there are also so many reasons why i should've said no.

so we ended up training back to harbourfront.

and that was when i saw your tweets.

i was like, 'oh shit.'

and i texted you, and yes of course you were mad.

i mean, you have the right to be lah.

the week before you kept asking me if i wna go on fri(26/11).

i was really tempted to but then i wanted to keep my promise.

so i kept declining and eventually didnt go.

and then the next day, i said that im going powerhouse.

if it was me, i would've been hurt too.

but even after knowing that you were pissed i couldnt say 'guys i cant go. im going home.'

i mean tbh, even if you were pissed at me, it's no reason for me to bail out on my friends, right?

they may even end up not going because of me because it would only be down to the 4 of them plus only Dawn is able to get in without worries.

dont get me wrong, im not trying to shift the blame to my friends, im just trying to explain here.

i texted you but then after awhile you tweeted saying 'dk what to say to you'

so i sort of thought that it would be best to let you be.

because i know you need a little while to chill. plus you wouldnt reply me either.

and now, i know you're still pissed. but you're the kind who still wants to know what's going on even if you're angry.

so yeah.

the reason why i didnt want to go on friday was because of my mum.

i knew she would be upset with me because i have already went clubbing the past 2 weeks.

and i had nothing to tell her if she asked why i am going.

yesterday, i told her it was Gerald's birthday, which was true.

yeah, im done explaining here.

and all i can say is im sorry that i hurt you and disappointed you.

i hope you wont be mad anymore.

and hope that you'll be ok after reading this.

even though i know this doesnt fully justify why i went last night.

but..yeah. thanks for reading nonetheless.

From: J