I Try to Pull Back, but You Pull Me Closer

last week i would still be planning what time to wake up the nxt day to go sch early to study.
but now im freeeeee! ;D
haha. just came back from my cousin's,wisely, bday celeb.
there were tons of kids lahh.
cause his classmates were there. he is only P1. haha.
then got Shaun and my 2 cousins, Dylan and Davier.

before that i rushed to TM to get sab, janice and wisely's present.
didnt go for janice's bbq in the end. cause my throat hurts like crap! ;(
i just hope i will still be able to sing tmr! ;O
anyway, in the end sab and wanyi didnt go also. haha.
well, the party was alright. kinda boring at the start though. lols.
the kids were damn cute. that's cause they werent screaming and yelling at the top of their lungs. haha!
i think i may end up liking them after all. but not as much as cleo does! ;)

anyways, i think i may know what i want to take/be in future! ;)
Psychology or Child Psychology. haha!
i have been contemplating about that since last year, i think.
but like, people kept saying it's difficult and like, it's the only route to take once you start learning it.

but when i see how helpless i am when my friends confide in me, i feel sad, honestly.
it's like, when i listen to my friends' woes and stories, i have nothing to say or dont know what to say.
i feel the need to really help them and comfort them, encourage the,.
but i have no idea how to. im afraid that what i say may hurt them instead.
at this point of time, i feel helpless.

when i see kids down, or lonely, like when they pull themselves away, i think about myself.
cause like, im sensitive and emotioal. i dont know if this is good or what.
but like, i will keep my distance and isolate myself when i dont feel comfortable.
that's when im quiet and stoning. yeahhs.
i want to go up to those kids and tell them, "i know how you feel. really. cause that's how i feel too."

im not trying to be noble or what.
it's just that, i can even imagining myself helping someone by lending them a listening ear.
cause i guess that's what im best at: Listening

well, there's a lot more i wanna say.
but i guess, that' ll i shall reveal for now ;)


``i ask the stars, how do i stop my heart from loving someone?